Is Hardballing the Dating Trend We’ve Been Waiting For?
Hardballing is a new dating trend that’s sweeping the nation, and it’s easy to see why.
When you’re on the hunt for a date, it can be frustrating when the person you’re talking to leaves you on read, or worse, ghosts you.
You don’t know what happened or if you did something wrong. You’re left clueless because they just bailed out of your “situationship.”
In today’s generation, hardballing is a great way of getting straight to the point. If they’re no longer interested in you, they will directly tell you without giving you mixed signals or leaving you hanging.
If you don’t get what you want, then tough luck — at least you know where everyone stands, and you can move on.
HOWEVER, many people also say that this dating trend isn’t as good as everyone says it is.
They believe that it is a way of imposing one’s own expectations on others, and it can be perceived as demanding or selfish.
And this is where the dilemma lies. It may come across as overly aggressive, which can be off-putting to others.
It’s the most honest form of dating out there.
When you’re hardballing someone, you’re not saying that you don’t want them to be your boyfriend or girlfriend — you’re saying, “I like you enough that I want to keep seeing you on some level (maybe even as friends), but not enough that I don’t mind if this ends here.”
That may seem harsh, but keep in mind that as adults we’re all responsible for our own choices in relationships. If someone wants to keep seeing someone they aren’t even really interested in, they could be doing so out of fear of change or because they feel comfortable (or both).
It’s better than leading someone on.
Leading someone is manipulative and hurtful. It involves giving mixed signals or false hope, which can lead to confusion and disappointment for the other person.
Meanwhile, hardballing actually saves everyone time and confusion.
You’re telling someone right off the bat that you want something casual without setting any expectations as far as labels or future plans.
Being direct and assertive can help them make an informed decision about whether they want the same thing from you — if they do, great! If they don’t, then at least there won’t be any confusion later on about what your intentions were all along.
Be honest and considerate.
You can be honest and direct about your expectations, but you should still consider the other person’s feelings and needs.
If you’re concerned about hurting their feelings, break the news in a way that you still empathize with them. Use language that is direct but not confrontational and try to understand their perspective.
That way, you won’t have to deal with the fallout from people who may have taken your actions personally. Also, it allows both parties to be more authentic and respectful to each other.
Remember, finding a balance between honesty and tact can be key to successful dating. I wish you the best of luck!
